The other day on Facebook, I read some tips and tricks to negotiate discounts and rebates.

There were many creative ideas and examples of white lies.

Here are some of the tricks that came up:

• One person always said “This is above my budget” and waited for an answer.
• One asked for a student discount… in his seventies.
• One person said they had seen a better offer elsewhere (a white lie).
• One stated it was too expensive and waited for a reaction.
• Someone lied in a house trade by saying the bank only approved a smaller loan.
• Someone else called up a hotel and asked for 5 dollars less per night.

What’s the problem with applying for discounts and rebates?

There are three main problems:

Your Focus Is on Lack of Resources

What thoughts lie behind haggling?

It’s a mindset of seeing money as a scarce resource, and it’s rooted in a mindset of lack.

That mindset is being reinforced as you haggle and tell little white lies about not being able to afford something.

It may well be that you call it a “white lie” when you tell a clerk that you can’t afford a dress, but it becomes your truth.

What do I mean by that? It’s a phrase that you say out loud, and your subconscious mind is listening in.

When you say “It’s too expensive” or “It’s over my budget”, that becomes the reality you create for yourself.

Your psyche thinks, “Aha, that’s what you want” and begins to create situations that confirm it, over and over again.

Do you use affirmations? Those small, positive phrases that we say to ourselves to affect the outcome?

It can be phrases like:

“I can do this!”

Or:

“There is abundance in my life.”

“I attract prosperity from all sides.”

With the little white lies, you create negative affirmations.

You Won’t Get the Best

The wealthiest people do the exact opposite of haggling.

They pay more for things.

They spontaneously treat their friends to dinner, they give generous tips, and they look for quality when they buy things – almost ignoring price.

They don’t like sales (have you ever wondered why there are never sales in shops like Hermès and Louis Vuitton?)

I got help from a friend when I moved to Portugal. She had lived in Portugal before and could show me the shops and help me get adjusted.

While we walked around and bought everything from drying racks to floor scrubbers, she kept saying, “Get the most expensive one”.

“Why?” I asked.

“It’s better,” she replied.

As we stood by the drying racks, I noticed how the cheap one was light in material. The expensive one was heavy and seemed better quality.

This is often the case. Quality costs more. We already know that. The best ones won’t go on sale.

After she flew back home, I continued looking for the best quality above all.

When shopping for a hair dryer, I thought of my old one that I had left behind.

I had bought it on sale in Lidl shortly after I had been fired on maternity leave (oddly enough, I still remember the price).

At the time, the focus of my life was largely on lack and fear.

That hair dryer smelled of plastic – it smelled toxic – and that smell didn’t go away with time.

When I dry my hair, the children often come over and want me to blow on them. They think it’s fun. I was often torn between denying them a little everyday fun or sending hot toxic air at a dancing and laughing toddler.

I ended up throwing it out when we moved – which is so bad for the environment too.

What did I do at the store in Portugal?

I pointed to the most expensive one they had. It felt heavy and solid. It had a place of its own in the store. Slightly raised above the others, as if it were the king of the hair dryers.

They had to order it in for me because they didn’t have it in stock.

What did it cost? I can’t remember. I didn’t care.

Does it smell like plastic?

Not at all.

It’s worth all the money because now I can enjoy my children’s excitement without fear.

You Might Lose the Trade and Hurt the Relationship

When you’re in a situation where there are several buyers, such as buying a house, a service, or a recycled item, you could lose the deal if you begin to seek out a bargain.

If you start haggling over the house, you may lose the chance to buy your dream home.

If you ask for a discount at the hairdresser, she may ask you to find another place or get annoyed with you.

Both in my business and privately, I don’t bother to go ahead with those who ask for a discount.

I only want customers who pay the full price with an attitude of excitement and gratitude. They’re the most fun customers that focus on learning and getting the most out of it.

What Should You Do Instead?

Try to focus on prosperity every day.

Focus on how much you have and cultivate an attitude of gratitude.

It doesn’t have to have anything to do with material things.

You can go for a walk and enjoy the view. Enjoy the beauty of the scenery. Enjoy the generosity of the trees. The dance of the clouds. The fresh air. The chirping of the birds.

If you quiet your mind, you can reach a place where you can feel prosperity as a strong physical force.

Some will feel goosebumps. Others a trembling sensation of joy through the body.

Try to meditate on your inner sense of prosperity for at least 15 minutes three times a day. Morning, midday, and evening.

True prosperity is so much more than money. It is an inner sense of freedom, love, generosity, gratitude, physical well-being, and wonderful relationships.

There is an infinite stream of wealth, abundance, and prosperity, and it lives within you.

When you become good at cultivating this feeling, you’ll also attract outer prosperity.

It sounds like abracadabra, but it’s not.

Your inner world and your outer world are connected. Of course they are.

As long as you focus on chasing deals and getting special discounts, you focus on scarcity and the material part of prosperity.

The good news (for those who are stuck on “lack attack”) is that daily meditations on prosperity are completely free. Not only that: It’s also 15 minutes that you don’t spend chasing deals on stuff you’ll probably never use anyway.

How does this relate to investments? It’s a perfect fit.

You’ll become a better and calmer investor when you feel inner prosperity and abundance.

You’ll be less likely to panic and sell in fear or buy in greed because you are beyond that.

Learn how to invest with my (free) e-book Free Yourself. You can download it here.